How to Increase your Charm to Attract the One You Love in Romantic Relationship?

4 min readJan 10, 2021

By: Jessica Peng (two-time top-selling author in Taiwan)

Do you have a difficult time getting to know the person you like? Do you have any difficulty getting close to the one you admire?

Now let me tell you the secret to open up your romantic possibilities: You don’t have to change yourself or hide from anyone else because what one person thinks is an advantage may be regarded as a disadvantage by another. In contrast, another person’s disadvantage may be considered as an advantage by another.

So, don’t get engulfed in the relationship during the initial stage because you have to figure out whether the other party’s contributions are equivalent.

When choosing a partner, don’t wait mindlessly and be sure to pay attention to whether the other person is putting in effort.

The best way to increase your charm is to precisely and intellectually express your thoughts and opinions.

Letter from a reader:

“I am a third-year university student and like a guy in the fourth year of the university. I don’t know why but I’ve I liked him since I saw the guy during my freshman year. In order to get closer to him, I also joined the clubs he is part of. I dress up to attend the club meetings and hope that I will have an opportunity to grab his attention. In every club activity, I try to act my best in front of him.
I also wondered whether I should let the guy know I like him or play hard to get. I have been in unrequited love; how can I make him like me?”

My response to the reader:

From your question, I can see that you put much effort into impressing the guy you admire, whether it’s your appearance at the school club gathering or acting your best to impress him.

Here I would like to share three tips that might help you to attract the person you admire. However, for you to attract the one you want, you have to focus on the three tips listed below to boost your inner power.

1. Don’t treat friends as lovers

You must first determine your “role” in your relationship with the other party in order to decide how you send messages in front of them.

For love to unfold, the premise is to meet someone who appreciates you and likes you.

Don’t mistakenly treat your friend as a lover. The friendship can turn into a romantic relationship by mutual desire. But if your friend only treats you as a friend, don’t waste time putting your energy into it. Instead, it would help if you put more time and effort into yourself to improve yourself. Then the one you admire will be the one who respects you.

Put time and energy on yourself first. When you become what you like, it will naturally attract your crush’s attention. Even if the one you like still does not pay attention to you, you still have the opportunity to meet other people. Don’t focus one tree and lose an entire forest.

2. Express yourself naturally when facing the one you like

Present yourself in your “natural “form. You don’t need to please the other party specifically; just be yourself.

Remember to radiate positive energy during the interaction. Don’t have long-term commitment expectations for the other person because these expectations can come through in your words and actions, potentially scaring the one you like away.

In this situation, the other party will feel pressured and you will also feel disappointed because the other party’s words and deeds do not meet your expectation. Don’t foolishly show affection; you must check whether the other party’s contribution to the relationship is equivalent.

3. Don’t forget yourself. Showing your characteristics in love

Make sure not to over contribute and make sure the other party feels appreciated.

To increase your charm, don’t forget yourself. Try to present your unique characteristics because everyone in this world is different, so you have to acknowledge your own character.

Many people misinterpret appearance as an essential factor in having a good love relationship. This is an incorrect myth. Many people who only emphasize appearance aren’t guaranteed a long-lasting romantic relationship because the most attractive part of a person is a unique personality.

Many people who insist that appearance is essential in a relationship experience unhappy relationships. So, improving their outfits and appearance allowed them to attract more people, but they forget that more options doesn’t guarantee a long-lasting relationship.

4. Learn how to express your thoughts and opinions.

To attract each other, many young people put too much emphasis on finding “similarities” with one another.

They were mistakenly thinking that this will increase their charm in the process of getting along. It is undeniable that two people with high similarities can easily be comfortable with each other; however, if you purposely transform yourself into a person who resembles the other person, that kind of transformation cannot last. It is not the real you.

For single men and women, not finding the one you like is not because you are not good enough; it is because you haven’t yet learned how to express the best of yourself.

**This article was previously published in Babyou Magazine in 2020

If you know Mandarin, you can read my book『戀愛脫單魅力學』（時報出版）. This book will help single men and women choose someone who likes them and accepts their whole package.

The links to this book are listed below.《戀愛脫單魅力學》

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https://www.amazon.ca/s?k=戀愛單身魅力學&ref=nb_sb_noss

Taiwan:

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